Use Foreshadowing in Dialogue to Establish Believability

Here's an excerpt from my recent book, "The Editor Devil's Guide to DIALOGUE":

Foreshadowing is a great tool in dialogue to establish believability.

The reader sometimes needs help to swallow whatever truth is coming. By dosing information in small amounts along the way, such as through foreshadowing dialogue, the reader can “work up to” the truth.

For example: An old lady who kills her only son. Maybe’s a petty thief, but it’s still hard to swallow that she’d kill him. But easier to swallow if the reader sees the slow degradation of their relationship in dialogue.

You can move from friendly “Love you, ma” to more tense “Why are you always sweating me, ma” to threatening “Remember what happened the last time you took that tone with me, ma.” Maybe even to a conversation hinting at the abuse he experienced while she turned a blind eye.

Now we’re foreshadowing two plot elements that could come to pass: he’s going to explode, or she has to stop him before he does. That's good drama and great tension!

So think of it this way: any element of your story that would be “too large to swallow” in the opening should be foreshadowed and layered until it’s revealed. By then, the reader will expect and accept it.

But be careful: too much foreshadowing and the reader will feel they’ve already read the whole book.

Yours Truly,

The Editor Devil

My Dialogue Book Now on Kindle!

Last week I published "The Editor Devil's Guide to Dialogue: top tips and tricks for fiction writers" as an eBook on Kindle. This is a compilation of the dialogue class I taught online, so all my top advice is packed into this eBook.

"Likes" and "tags" on the book's Amazon page are appreciated! Just click the Like button next to the book title, or scroll down and select the tags that best fit the category for this book (or fill in your own suggestions). These help my book ranking and placement on Amazon.

I hope this book reaches lots of authors and editors looking to make their fiction dialogue irresistible. Moreover, I hope it inspires folks to push their limits with writing dialogue and not settle for the same old same old. Imagination runs deeper than you think, so pushing yourself can produce your best work!

An excerpt of the book can be found in my blog entry for Savvy Authors, "3 Do's& Don'ts of Dialogue". I'll be teaching my class Sensational Scenes for Savvy Authors May 14-27, so come join me live. This is currently the only class I'm scheduled to teach in the next few months.

For now, here's one of my Dialogue Do's & Don'ts from the eBook:

#15 Create Undercurrents & Ripples

DON’T… Use blatant, safe words all the time.

DO… Use loaded words. Getting “blamed” is not the same as getting “accused” or getting “charged” for something. Simple words are often best, especially in contrast to complex situations, but using words that have undercurrent creates more interest.

DON’T… Speak without color or flavor or sound or feeling or... Forgetting the senses in narrative is a no-no. So too in dialogue.

DO… Use visceral language. Don’t forget to employ the senses (sight, sound, feel, smell, taste) in speech to reveal colors, textures, odors, patterns, or even sixth sense perceptions. And let characters occasionally speak in rich imagery, similes and metaphors. This makes dialogue more sensual, more sexy overall.

Yours truly,

The Editor Devil

My First Book On Kindle

I'm thrilled to announce I published my first book to Kindle. No, it was not my romantic suspense but my book honoring my working dog, Bo, who died of cancer over Christmas (see "Bo Doesn't Know" http://www.amazon.com/Bo-Doesnt-Know-ebook/dp/B007A53PKK/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1329712144&sr=8-1).

This book was a total work of love, a photo story about his time living with cancer and the silly changes we made as humans to help him. Your tags/likes on the Amazon page are much appreciated, as well are reviews!

For those who are going to ePub their own work to Kindle, if you need help with formatting problems, especially images (there are 20 in my book--so I experienced a lot of issues!), ping me. I learned so much the hard way with this book, even though I'd taken a class and read all the instructions. Let's just say there's a lot of kinks in the system!

Anyway, just wanted to celebrate publishing my first book...on to publishing my writing/editing classes and my romantic suspense next month. It’s such a new/exciting world for authors!

Much love to you all in the New Year!

Your Editor Devil,

Christine

Well, if you've wondered why I've been so silent, I can answer you in one word: PUPPY.

*One of us (obviously not you!) forgot that puppies are like babies for the first few weeks--up every 3 hours and ready to be entertained and fed. Needless to say, sleep deprivation has taken its toll. I'm doing dumb things like putting my keys in the silverware drawer. Hey, they're shiny and silver, right?

I'm writing in spurts on books, but don't trust myself with editing, let alone finalizing any business decisions. So I set aside the book release and I'm enjoying my days with Tucker (see that smiling face above) while he's still a puppy.

I promise to return in the next few weeks with new insights and tips for great editing and/or writing. In the meantime, check out my article in the RWR (RWA's monthly magazine) on the "5 Online Marketing Tools You've Never Heard Of".

And triple thanks to everyone who helped me by giving feedback on my book covers. The final version will be unveiled next month!

Regards,
Your Editor Devil

Vote for My Book Cover

I am putting my book covers to a vote. Here are two potential book covers for my romantic suspense.

NOTE: these are mockups, so the images have not been purchased yet and therefore have watermarks and quality issues. And I'll change out the guy image, so the gun is more evident. But the color/layout will be the same. Also, this is going to be a series, so the other book titles are "A Taste for Sin" and "An Ear for Lies". Whichever design I choose has to apply to all 3 books, though the coloring (like blue vs. orange) will change per book.

Give your vote in the comments section. I will send a $10 Starbucks card to one lucky commenter randomly picked (by my hubby) :)

Option 1:

Option 2:

Hope is A Puppy

Our first week without Bo was not easy. My eyes are tired. I've cried every day since his diagnosis, every night since his death. And my home feels empty, alone. Like love is missing. Because it is. A third of my family is gone.

Keeping myself busy isn't enough to fast-forward the grieving process. I've been finishing the book on Bo, working on photographs, prepping to teach my dialogue class to the YA chapter of RWA... Looking at puppies online has helped the most, however, because you can't feel sad when you look at their scrunchy faces.

So Sunday my husband pulls me out of bed, though I have a terrible head cold, and announces we are going on a road trip to Port Orchard to visit a litter of puppies. He's clearly tired of the gloom hanging over our home. I am too, so I drag myself to the shower. I know we have to move on eventually, but my plan was to rescue another dog from a shelter again. My hesitation builds. I know I need another dog in my life, yet it feels way too soon. Every dog I see is NOT Bo.

We drive and ferry it to Port Orchard, sit and play with puppies that all look alike to me and Rob, and we're a bit overwhelmed by having to chose among these little critters who haven't formed their personalities yet. When you chose an adult dog, such as from a shelter, you can distinguish their character.

Over the course of a half hour, however, one pup is making his moves more often than the others---he's tugging on Rob's pant leg, nipping on his shoe lace, and then attacking my coat. Rob remarks he likes the fiestiness (read dominance) in this puppy, but that the puppy's tail has a crick in the tip. I, on the other hand, adore that flaw. I don't care about pure-bred perfection or AKC papers. Rob wants more confidence in the dog's health, so breeder assurances as to lineage gives Rob his power back, makes him believe we can avoid the trauma of Bo's cancer in our future dog. Whatever gives him hope, I condone.

So we pick the imperfect puppy with the crooked tail. And in 2 weeks we pick him up. Enough time for me to clean up the house, get over my cold, work through more grief steps. I cry on the way home, I cry that night. Rob doesn't understand why I'm still sad. It's real now; we are having to replace Bo, my one and only. He's really gone.

Mostly I'm worried I won't bond with the puppy in the same way. I think crazy thoughts, like I won't love his smell or the feel of his coat or the depth of his bark the way I did with Bo. But we HAVE to move forward. Bo was all about progress, not paralysis. As Rob put it, a puppy cannot replace Bo, but he can eclipse Bo's death. We NEED hope to fill our home.

Hope is a puppy.

Dogs Dont' Cry

I've been very absent from blogging, mostly due to deadlines, vacation, and now my working dog, Bo, who was diagnosed with cancer. Please follow his story at EveryoneLovesBo.blogspot.com. We are raising money to pay for his surgeries, so I'll be posting items for sale here and on his blog site, and I'll be publishing stories on Kindle about lives he's touched. Here's the first entry on his blog site...If nothing else, please enjoy it as a storytelling experience. Thank you, and blessings to you and your family and pets!

While giving me a long-overdue-haircut yesterday, instead of chiding me for ruining my hair with hotel shampoos and swimming in chlorinated pools and rinsing in a salty Caribbean, my hairdresser, Zan Schmidt was crying.

Pictures of my chocolate lab/rottie mix, Bo, slid across my laptop screen as Zan (Tussle Salon, Seattle) snipped away and two-inch strands fell around me. I blew the hairs off my keyboard to click another photo, awaiting her approval. We needed Bo’s five best shots, and Zan has a great eye. When her eyes aren’t clouding with tears, that is.

Zan’s not just a dog lover, but a dog rescuer. A few years back, she’d received a Katrina dog through a “reputable” agency, but a year later the owner showed up and demanded the dog back. That broke Zan’s heart. Eventually she adopted another dog and is back in doggy heaven, happily scooping poops and paying vet bills to keep her little buddy healthy. But she knows what it’s like to lose a dog-friend.

Now her heart is cracking a little again.

“Don’t cry,” I said. “He’s not dead yet.”

“I can’t help it, he’s so sweet,” she said, running to bathroom to wipe her eyes.

As she later blew out my healthy hair, we chose the final shots and I explained my plan. I needed the photos for an exhibit at my local Roosevelt Starbucks, an opportunity I happened to be offered that morning when I told the manager, Jen Sinconis, that I’m creating ways to raise money for Bo’s surgeries. Bo had walked with me to Starbucks—he’s all about the treats Jen gives him—and was watching us through the window.

“He doesn’t know he has cancer,” I’d told Jen, who has a Boston/Staffordshire terrier mix and is adopting an Australian shepherd this weekend. “He just wants to play with his dog buddies.”

Jen knows what it’s like to fight to save lives. Her twins nearly died as infants, so she wrote a book about her journey called “A Pound of Hope” (www.APoundofHope.biz) to help other families find hope. Hence, Jen understands I’m doing everything I can to raise money for Bo’s surgeries.

We’d saved for our vacation to the Caribbean in November, celebrating our 5^th wedding anniversary at our honeymoon hotel. A much needed trip away from reality after my husband’s health scare and a summer of discussing wills and life insurance. What we hadn’t saved in cash for the vacation, we put on our credit card. Then we came home to find a tumor in Bo’s mouth.

Cancer. That word just sucks. Most of Bo’s upper left teeth, bone, and maybe even nasal passage are expected to be removed. We’ll know more when we get the biopsy next week to tell us which type of cancer. But already we’ve hit $1,000 in bills, and we haven’t even started the removal surgery! Then there’s the CT scans and X-rays next week, a consult with the oncologist, and then the big surgery. We see thousands of dollars in bills zooming toward us, but never do we want to make a decision based on lack of money. Whatever we can do to save his life, we want the money to be ready.

And so my fundraising brain is in high-drive, and I’m combing through things I can sell, such as his photos, my classes, anything.

The bone will heal, the dental vet told me. Still, I wondered after the surgery what face I’d be snuggling at night as I stared at his handsome chocolate lab profile, like he’s posing for the camera in front of Mt. Pilchuck, WA. I tell everyone Bo thinks he’s Frank Sinatra, but he’s really more like Dean Martin. Part crooner, part ham.
As I went to pay for my haircut, Zan pulled me aside and whispered in my ear, “You’re not paying me today.”

“Of course I am.”

“No, this is my contribution toward Bo’s cause. Merry Christmas.”

Now I’m the one crying. Kindness is tough to swallow right now. It softens me when I need to be hard, when I must push forward, get appointments scheduled, and be cheerful around Bo when I really feel like doubling over sobbing. I can’t let him see me down, or he’ll try to console me and absorb sad energy, which he doesn’t need.

You see, Bo is not just a pet, but my working buddy. He helps me rehab dogs for behavior problems, like Daddy helped Caesar Milan, the Dog Whisperer. Bo’s also been to a classroom with third graders, worked with kids with autism, and visits the retirement home and assisted care facility, where my mother-in-law lives.

And Bo was basically my assistance dog when I got PTSD after two years of caretaking for my mother-in-law, who has dementia. Bo was my companion in public when just being in a room of other people made me shiver. He saw me through, for better or for worse. So the least I can do is not fall apart around him.

I hugged Zan hard and headed to my art studio, my office as an author, to work on Bo's images. I’d barely made it through the door when my studio mates burst forward with hugs and chocolate. Beth (www.BethMeans.com) and Martha (www.MarthaMeans.com) are sisters who paint watercolors that sweep you into another world. When they originally invited me into their studio, they said dogs were welcome and encouraged.

Annie, their golden retriever, had been a client because of her excitable dominance and anxiety issues, so she and Bo were already familiar. They became fast buddies after we moved in, and I’m including a muddy photo of her in the exhibit book to honor her.

Unfortunately, we lost Annie this past summer. On a Friday she was diagnosed with lymphoma, a very deadly cancer in dogs, and she was going downhill fast. On the following Monday she was put to sleep. Cancer really, really sucks. Bo and I had visited Annie to say goodbye and Bo acted like nothing bad was happening. Maybe he did know she had cancer, maybe he didn’t. Dogs don’t cry. They just want to play.

To my studio mates I explain my plan to save Bo’s life, that I hope we need the money because I want him to NEED the surgeries. The alternative is worse—if the cancer is too far gone, then we may have to make the decision Beth and Martha made for Annie. But I’m praying that doesn’t happen. Already his blood tests came back clean, which is a good sign the cancer hasn’t metastasized. So I’m fighting to raise the money to give us surgery options.

And here are my friends to fight with me. Beth tells me I’m not paying rent on the studio next month. And Martha wants to donate too. They want to help spread the word. Again, I’m stunned, and those damn tears start pushing through.

And I’m smiling too. Everyone loves Bo. He’s touched so many lives, so many dogs, so many humans. I’d decided to "retire" him from working this past summer, because he absorbs anxiety from other dogs and humans and I wanted him to be free of that and live out some "retirement" years. Yet here he is, touching lives again, bringing folks together.

But it’s more than his magic happening here, I realize. It’s the magic of kindness. And it’s Bo’s turn to receive.

ENCORE POST: Creating Characterization through Dialogue

Characterization is the painting of a character in a story through narrative, dialogue and action. Done well, the character will come to life on the page as if they are a real person.

Done poorly, and the author has succeeded in creating cardboard. And the reader will never forget it.

As Noah Lukeman puts it in his book, The Plot Thickens, "...character is the basis for all further talk of journey, conflict, suspense—and is the cornerstone of plot..."

Characterization is achieved by the author through the careful delivery of external (descriptions of how the character looks, walks, drinks their coffee) and internal information (how they act in any given situation, who they interact with, the decisions they make, the decisions they don’t make). Note that these do not break down the same as internal and external dialogue.

Nouns and verbs chosen for dialogue directly affect the intensity of tone and the reader's perception of the character. These words can reveal whether the character is dominant or submissive, passionate or dispassionate.

Also, the choppiness of dialogue sentences and whether the character speaks complete sentences may tell the character’s attitude or even education level. Consider how terse dialogue is spoken by a character who is combative, how sensitive phrases might be used by a caretaking character. Doing the reverse can be even more interesting. Consider how jokes from a bank robber make his/her character more interesting.

Remember: In fiction, what they say IS who they are. Even and especially when the character is lying.

Getting to the Heart of Characters

Because it's such a difficult subject to get right, let's talk more about inserting Heart into your novel. Not the Heart of the story, but the Heart of the character, so that the reader cares whether the character wins or loses.

First, what ISN'T Heart... When a character "owes" their life/career/marriage/etc to someone else, that debt does not constitute Heart. Neither does the fear of losing life/career/marriage/etc. These just puts strings on her behavior and represent Motivational aspects in the character's development, also known as their Arc.

What is Heart? Think about what your character would sacrifice whether he/she felt like she owed or not and regardless of his/her fears. That's where Heart is: beyond the self, beyond paying debts owed, beyond fear.

RISE ABOVE THE STANDARD
Heart is about rising above the self for a greater good, a greater belief that is so core to the character it makes them "worthy" of our trust, admiration, and esteem.

Heart is based on one's values/ethics; what the character will die for to uphold. A villain will die to uphold his grip on power, perhaps because it's what makes a man righteous with God in his mind. Icky, yes, but deeper POV than just "he likes power" right? That's Heart, even though it's dark.

Similarly, a hero will fight to save the damsel not because he's meeting the definition of heroic, but because he's driven by fears, hopes, and values. Again, the fears and hopes part is related to his character development. The values part is connected to his Heart--what he values makes him valuable in this world (i.e. worthy of our caring about him in your book) and is the strongest motivation for taking up the mantle of Hero and saving the day.

Like a fireman who will run into a fire to save a child not JUST because his father abandoned him as a kid, not JUST because he's afraid of never feeling loved/worthy in life--lots of folks feel that way and don't run into fires. But he will actually go into that fire, will risk his own life, because of his core beliefs. For example, he might believe a child has no power to defend itself, so it's an adult’s duty to protect the innocent because that's how a sane community (read "family") treats its own. That value would define a lot of his behavior, and make you trust that man with your child any day!

HEART CULMINATES FEAR AND HOPE
So you see, the fears and hopes and pain of the past INFORM a character's core values. In the example above, he is choosing to be the hero he needed as a child to 'right' the world that wronged him. He doesn't want another child to hurt like he did. But even more than this avoidance of pain, he wants to do it because it's right for the higher good.

So yes, Heart stems from fear and pain and old debts, but it's something higher, an elevated belief. It's taking all that pain and fear and incorporating courage and power and a little beautiful humanity.

This is deep psychology folks. Not easy stuff. If you've ever read "A Prayer For Owen Meany", you know that Heart drives the whole book. And it's unforgettable. That's what I want to help you achieve with your story. And once you really understand how to reveal Heart for your character, your future books will get easier to write.
Yours,
The Editor Devil.

Tips for Self-publishing Your Best Work

Since we've been discussing the self-publishing eBook path (and I spent the weekend doused in such conversations at NW Bookfest in Kirkland, WA.) I thought I'd give those who choose this route a few tips and tricks.

1. This Writer's Weekly article, Top Signs a Book is Self-Published, helped point out some of the no-no's that make you look like an amateur.
2. The reader forum on Amazon titled "Dear Author: Please Don't..." is great for finding issues that annoy readers. Like naming your hero character “Rafe” in a Romance. Been there, read that. But you can't take all the reader remarks seriously, or else you'd never be able to finish a book!
3. More than anything, I want to press the concept of good editing. No one should publish to Kindle material hasn't been copyedited and proofread. Personally, I use an editor named Lisa Costantino (http://www.lisacostantino.com/), because I trust her with my stories and my career.

That being said, I recently sent out my manuscript without having sent it to her first. Well, despite being an editor of 25 years, I’m dyslexic and can’t proof my own work. In fact, I sub my proofing for this reason. Let’s just say I later found all kinds of errors in my manuscript. But now I can’t take back sending it. Lesson RE-learned!

Please, please, please, authors...DO find and editor/proofreader you trust, and do your due diligence on the manuscript before you send it to agents or publishing editors and especially before you publish to an eBook format!

Best to you,
Your Editor Devil

Know Your Business: Indie eBook or Traditional Publishing

So I'm reading about the indie eBook publishing revolution till my brain is numb. But that's part of being a good author--being a solid business person. You have to know your business as well as your craft. After all, if I can't afford to stay in business, I won't produce much writing!

My advice to fellow authors is to do your research and think very carefully about which direction you should to go to be published: indie ePublishing, such as Amazon, or traditional, such as one of the Big 6 NY houses (which aren’t really six, but that's another conversation).

Did you know:
10-20% of Barnes & Noble's Top 100 come from PubIt?
Amazon owns around 80% of ebook marketand about 20% of print in the UK ?

WADE THROUGH THE INFO

Now there's a lot of information to wade through about ePublishing vs. traditional publishing, so I've got a few links to get you started.

1. First off, read the sales stats for eBooks. This is an industry that's doubling sales every few months. My two favorites are:

A) http://publishingperspectives.com/2010/05/e-book-sales-statistics-from-bisg-survey/

B) http://idpf.org/about-us/industry-statistics (these are last year’s stats, but shows the pattern)

2. Second, know how readers find eBooks so you understand where your audience could be:

http://blog.smashwords.com/2011/09/how-ebook-buyers-discover-books.html

3. Next, read how some compare the traditional model with the independent model. Warning: despite the rants, there's a lot of logic to their cases. Mostly, writers have been getting the worst of the profit margins for a long time and the new model offers them a way to greater financial success and personal control.

A) Kris Rusch: http://kriswrites.com/2011/09/21/the-business-rusch-professional-writers/ (wade through the 1st half to get to the meat of the article)

B) And her husband, Dean Wesley Smith, on thinking like a publisher: http://www.deanwesleysmith.com/?page_id=3736

DECIDE IF YOU’RE READY

4. Now you need to understand whether YOU should indie publish or not. Whether you have a backlist (many books already written and published and the rights have reverted back to you) or you are new and therefore a frontlist author. Bob Mayer gives one of the most frank observations of this topic at http://writeitforward.wordpress.com/2011/06/20/if-i-were-an-unpublished-author-would-i-self-publish/

5. And if you need examples of some agents eliminating the traditional NY publisher middleman from the model... http://www.mediabistro.com/galleycat/trident-media-group-launches-trident-e-book-operations_b38794

THINK FOR YOURSELF

These articles should be enough to get you started understanding the basis for this revolution and why you need to think for yourself so you don't fall into the same old pitfalls authors have been experiencing for years.

Frankly, I'd like to believe my readers and my students have the strength of self-esteem to NEVER work for free as an author (don't make me have to hunt you down and smack you upside the head!)

STAY OPEN TO ALL POSSIBILITIES

But I think the real lesson here is that it's important to stay open to change. And not to be afraid to take your career into your own hands. We're the only ones who are responsible for our success and failures.

Personally, I have submissions with several agents as we speak. And I have a couple publishing houses in mind that I'd like to target. (Berkeley, are you out there?) But I can't afford to be a fool either. Even if I get offers, I have to weigh the financial benefits and risks to my career. That and I have to answer to my partner and most patient husband.

So I'm keeping that indie eBook door open for now... And that's the best way to manifest the future: to believe that I'm going to publish means I WILL be published. Either way, traditional or indie, it's true.

In the meantime, our job remains the same: write amazing stories that capture your readers. And love every moment of being an author, both the craft and the business.

Cheers to all our successes! And please share this to your fellow authors and tell me your favorite sites/articles for info on these subjects...

Your Editor Devil

Change Your Flat Tire Verbs

If you're struggling with creating more active verbs in your novel, one way to make it easier is to do an edit pass where you switch out verbs based on which sensory experiences you want to highlight, either on behalf of character development or setting or tone of the book.

FIRST, FIND THE FLAT VERBS

Where to start? To be verbs are the obvious choices when hunting and eliminating. Then there are weak or everyday verbs, like walk, run, see, hear, talk, breathe, eat, smell, yell.

SECOND, PUMP UP VERB CHOICES

If I want to create a fog and gaslight London, I'm going to use moody verbs. Instead of "walk" I might choose "slink" or "glide" or "trudge" depending on the character. If it's a bubbly YA novel, I might use more upbeat tone in the verb, like "bop along" or "skip" or "bounce". My husband tells me I don't walk, I bounce. And since I often wear a ponytail, that bounces too. He thinks it's cute and adorable. Great. So much for ever looking hot and sultry!

Back to changing out your flat tire verbs.... Let's look at a more intricate example, let's change verbs based on character development. Say I'm introducing my photographer character, Jules, so in those first few pages there might be more visually-oriented verbs. To balance these out, I'm going to add that she is a very tactically-oriented person. And because she used to be a war photographer and now has PTSD, the world easily ramps up a few notches on the tension scale for her.

CREATE STRONG VERB COMBINATIONS

So, using this example profile, Jules doesn't “run” she “sprints/bolts/flies”. She doesn't "see" skyscrapers in NY she "fixates on the masses of glass and steel cutting the sky and dominating over her space." Okay, dramatic, but you get the idea.

CHECK YOUR WORK

When in doubt, choose a more dramatic verb than you intended, and then scale down. It's easier to find the right word and balance this way. And if you are using Word, you can test your Passive Voice percentage (i.e. the use of to be verbs) by selecting the "Show Readability Statistics" option embedded in the Spelling- and Grammar –check. This post’s content earned a 0% passive voice.

Go forth and edit, lads and lasses.

Your Editor Devil

Protecting Your Character's Voice

 A student asked me today how to protect character voice. Her experience with an editor, who slaughtered her character's dialogue and made the character say things not only the author felt were inappropriate and silly, but that went against the character's personality.

In my opinion, she had a bad editor match. A good editor should forage for the source of your disconnect.

Of course, they have to first know there is a disconnect. You have to stand up for your characters. It's not uncommon for authors to have to fight to maintain voice for themselves and their characters.

That' being said, here's something else to think about. The editor may think the character’s voice is weak, and so is beefing it up with changes. So sometimes you have to consider that the writing isn't strong enough and is being changed for a reason.

When an editor gives a suggestion, they are doing so based on the material at hand and how they judge the character from it. If you have not conveyed your character the way you think you have, the editor may judge the character inappropriately. And thus make suggestions not in line with your thinking. This is again an issue of the writer not making the character so strong on the page that the dialogue voice and style are crystal clear (even if the words needs tweaking).

Every once in a while my critique group (3 of whom are pro editors) will give me feedback that isn't in line with my character. I'll tell them that's not who the character is and ask what I've done to create the misinterpretation. Usually this clears up the matter: that somehow in the book I’ve mislead the reader on expectations. Again, it falls to me, the author, to be clearer.

Go forth and be clear.

Your Editor Devil.

Heroes as Villains: 6 Tips to Still Achieve a Character Arc

In literary fiction, we get all kinds of heroes, from sassy and brash, to sweet and romantic, to the anti-heroes who are self-loathing or wildly edgy. I personally love the anti-heroes of James Joyce's The Dead and Ulysses.


Typically, heroes in fiction face an external villain as well as the villains inside themselves. Doing battle with both really ups tension and relief and allows readers to fight vicariously against the wrongs in society.

But in Romance fiction, and most of its sub-genres, the hero is also the villain to the heroine. He's a grump or a tyrant or a renegade. Maybe he's the Rochester to your Jane Eyre, a married and bitter man to a sweet and innocent, though world-weary, ingenue.

Know the Villain Inside & Out 
The point of the book is for him to "get" the heroine, which means the hero's villainy must be "overcome."

The issue is that the hero never really overcomes his bad-ass self in Romance. Often, he just learns to manage it better, such as when he's around the heroine. Frankly, if you take away his edge, he's a mush-man. And no heroine (or her reader) wants a mushy guy in a true Romance.

And that leads us to a character arc problem. The hero MUST change, MUST improve himself in order to win the heroine's acceptance.

Follow These 6 Tips to Achieve a Character Arc 
So, how do you ensure change while allowing him to maintain his edge? Here are some examples of change the hero might present (based on the traditional male/female Romance relationship):

1) He's still a bad-ass, but she's now his ally. You don't bite your own pack member.

2) He uses his powers for good, not evil. He's more clearly aligned with defending innocents and battling bullies, especially as she "sees" them.

3) He lets her be on top. Ahem... I mean, he allows her to dominate in more areas, such as money or decisions or even where they eat, with the caveat that he "believes" he's still in charge. If you are already handling your husband this way, then you know what I mean.

4) He's willing to set aside friends in the name of love. Okay, so the guys will see it as a booty call, but the heroine needs to believe she's his #1 priority, not the Thursday Poker Night with the fellas.

5) He's more open to her than anyone else. More honest, more available emotionally, and more revealing than he previously was. This may be a change of centimeters as opposed to miles, as with the hero Roarke in JD Robb's "In Death" series, but so be it.

6) His edge is seen as an acceptable, if not cute, character flaw by the heroine. This is because she's able to overcome it through guile, wit, or just plain love.

This list surely can go on, but this will give you some tips to move that hero forward on his character arc, so your readers feel more satisfaction in seeing him truly change. But not dissolve into pudding.

Go forth and conquer!
Your Editor Devil.

Description vs Plot

One way to drag pacing and undermine reader engagement in fiction is to not offer a strong plot. And one reason for this problem is the substitution of extreme detail in lieu of plot.

Some authors are so good at writing description and setting and micro events, such as body movements, that they focus on this material at the expense of a larger plot. They literally give play-by-play movements of the characters--how they make coffee, how they pay bills, why they choose one grocery store over another.

But that’s not a story. That’s description. Story is based on major events taking place. People moving and changing. Plot is change on the macro level.

PLAY THE PLOT GAME

Let's write an example to make plot more obvious.

Plot is like the guy who packs a bomb into his luggage and heads for the airport; you can't avoid thinking about him.

On the next page you have two lovers having their first date. They're going to her favorite Italian bistro. He’s a gentlemen with all the right moves.

Meanwhile, the guy with the bomb has a flat tire and pulls over to fix it. Just his luck to buy a lemon. At least the car was cheap, and he needed to save money for the trip.

Back to the romance...the meal has been great and the couple lingers over drinks with amazing conversation and flirty touches. By now she's wondering if he'll ask for another date. She could stare at those thick blue eyes all night long, but doesn't want to seem easy. Then she realizes she never assessed if he was married. She's been used before, and hated that she was the "other woman". She excuses herself to the restroom and pulls out her iPod to do a quick search.

Back to the guy with the bomb. He’s back on the road, turning up the radio and singing along to Elton John as he enters the freeway. It starts to rain buckets, plunging traffic to a forced crawl.

On to the lovers... She's back at the table, having found him single on Facebook, and ready to ask for the next date herself. But then he gets a phone call that makes his eyebrows slap together and he rushes out of the restaurant.

The guy with the bomb is on the bridge now. His car rolls to a complete stop. But not because of traffic. He rolls to the shoulder. Actually, he shoulders the car onto the shoulder. Then sets the brake and locks it before grabbing the gas canister from the trunk and heading off to find the nearest gas station.

Meanwhile, the woman has caught up to her date, who's finishing an argument on the phone in front of the restaurant. The last thing she hears is "Just get to the gas station and I'll pick you up."

 FIND YOUR INNER BOMBER

Back to reality.... Plot is the bomb: the movement or change that your brain couldn’t stop tracking. And yet plot’s more than the bomb. It's the larger story occurring—that the date and the bomb might have someone in common.

Plot occurs beyond the micro details and intimate moments between characters. But if all you have are those intimate moments and details and ever-so-clever descriptions, and no bomb, then you have a story that will never really ignite the reader's interest.

So go forth and blow their minds, Angels!
Your Editor Devil

And if all else fails, watch this Kurt Vonnegut video on the universal plot and you won't stop laughing: http://www.wimp.com/everystory/